I did not post for June, as you may have noticed, and that reflects how thoroughly overwhelmed I felt at the time. I was wrapping up classes and working on final essays, and really trying to finish up too many things at once, especially without meds. I did manage to finally refill my meds, but it happened just before finals, and I ended up scrambling to finish what I could. Not the best showing I’ve ever given for a term, to be honest. I did present my preliminary research findings in May, though, and you can see the poster I made for the Undergraduate Student Research Symposium here.
Now for the resolution review:
Goals:
- Practice self-care and express self-compassion
- Ask for support and use my resources
- Build discipline and be creatively strategic
Month in Review:
What worked? What didn’t?
1) I took a week off after finals, which was nice, though I didn’t take it entirely off, and I probably should have in order to get the full benefit. I’ve been trying to let go of feeling like I need to study every second of the day, and working on giving myself breaks every day. I’ve been making sure I eat enough, and drinking a lot of water to stay hydrated. I reached out to my counselor for a referral to someone who takes my insurance, so I can get back to counseling. I’ve been reading a lot for leisure, when I need a break from my research reading. I’ve also made time to see friends, and that’s been really nice.
- Things that have been good: taking a week off after finals, reading books for leisure, bonding time with my bestie.
- Things that have not been good: spreading myself thin.
2) I’ve been meeting with my faculty mentor, and she’s trying to get me an office on campus to make my research easier. I’m looking forward to having a quiet space to work in, away from home. I also have met with a couple other professors to help me with research questions, and I met with my major advisor to make sure I’m on track to graduate by summer’s end. (I absolutely am, thankfully.) I’ve been asking for help from classmates and friends to get my research done, with mixed success, and working on letting friends help me when they offer.
- Things that have been good: reaching out to professors and advisors for help and answers.
- Things that have not been good: doing general asks for help instead of specific/targeted ones.
3) I’ve been using apps I already had on my phone to gamify necessary tasks, such as studying for the GRE, and learning Spanish/French. The week off threw my sleep schedule out of whack, and that’s been hindering my ability to get things done, since sleeping late means I have less time to make phone calls and visit archives in. I have managed to get some primary sources via interlibrary loan, and plenty of digitized government records, and I’ve created a folder in my dropbox containing just the works relevant to my research, culled down from the huge pool of potential sources from the last two terms. I’ve assessed my interests, the info I’m finding, and my available time, and modified my research plans for the summer accordingly, in order to be successful without working myself to exhaustion. I’m behind the schedule I made for myself in May, but I have 22 pages of research written up, and it’ll be easy to expand and revise with that much done.
- Things that have been good: playing phone games and using apps to study, talking over my research with friends and profs.
- Things that have not been good: wonky sleep schedule, slightly disorganized.
Planning the Next Month:
What am I working on going forward?
1) Going to see about meditating more, and try to eat a little healthier, as I can. I’m definitely not getting enough veggies. I also want to start walking in the park nearby—I’ve been cooped up in my apartment a lot lately, and it’s not awesome.
2) I need to do individual asks to folks I know who live in the Bay Area to find housing for a week so I can visit archives in/around San Francisco at the end of the month.
3) I will keep using phone apps to study languages and GRE prep. I need to fix my sleep schedule, especially since I’m daytripping to Seattle for a couple of archive days soon.
Hope y’all have a good weekend. Take care!
See all of the Groundhog Day Resolutions posts here.
Tessara Dudley, Poet-Publisher-Educator-Activist 